Beware of Isolation

“Solitude vivifies; isolation kills.”
—Joseph Roux

There are many times in our lives when we just wish we could crawl into a cave and get away from the world and hide from our problems. And while solitude, in small amounts, can be healthy and enlivening, isolation is not good for us.

Something to keep in mind when we pull away from friends and loved ones for any length of time is that prisoners are often put into isolation as punishment. They are kept away from interaction with other people and it often promotes physical deterioration and mental illness in the inmates. This is most likely not what we seek when we choose to isolate.

Most likely we isolate because we feel we’ve failed, or because we don’t think we can talk to anyone about what is going on with us either because they won’t understand or because we just never learned how to open up to others.

As human beings we were created to be social creatures. We were given many abilities that animals don’t have, such as language skills. Nature dictates that we interact with others, not just when we feel happy and upbeat, but also when we feel depressed and even needy. Often our problems are easier overcome when we talk about them, and usually when we hold in our pain or anger it just stays within us and grows.

It’s okay to show ourselves to another, to bear our heart and soul to someone who is willing to listen, who cares. Most of us have friends and family who are willing to do this for us, but if we don’t we may need to seek the help of a therapist, or member of the clergy, or for those in a 12 Step program a sponsor can help.

Most importantly we don’t continue to internalize our problems without asking for help. And we don’t use the self-imprisonment of isolation as a remedy either.

Seek solitude when needed, but avoid isolation.